I was at a party last night and this weird nerd guy was screaming and punching the wall whenever he missed at beer pong and I cornered him later and I was like “Hey, can I give you some constructive criticism?” And he was like “Uhh ok.” And I was like “People would like you a lot more if you weren’t going around screaming and punching walls like a fucking creep.” And he got really scared and asked “Are you going to kill me?” And I literally dont understand how he got that from what I said. I think I’m scarier than I realize.
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you shoulda killed him just as a power move
Ugh. Welp. That’s how today feels then.
declaring “this is the bad place” every time you are even slightly inconvenienced is peak humor
Dove chocolate and Dove soap are two different companies who havent sued each other because they have different trademarks lol
Damn and I really all this time just thought dove (the soap people) had a meeting one day and were just like “…. we might fuck around and make some chocolate”
^literally what I thought


